I really can't believe I am in my 3rd trimester already. It is really starting to sink in that I have mere weeks before this little guy arrives and I have NOTHING done. Literally. Nothing. I have a couple of out fits that I bought, but other than that. Nada.
What I do have:
-Loads of material that I have good intentions to turn into something cute
-No idea where the newborn/0-3 clothes are
-Really dirty baby items (i.e. carseat, bouncer, crib etc.)
-A house in shambles (granted, it will make things better in the long run. New windows! more on that later!)
-1st trimester symptoms coming back
-Nerves. Lots of nerves.
I just keep realizing that it has been a LONG time since I have had a baby or taken care of a baby full time. Jacob will be 5 1/2 by the time his brother comes along and I just wonder if I am up to it again. Sure, I have held/babysat babies since then. But in the end, they always go home with their moms. My child is self sufficient (for the most part), likes to take care of himself, gets his own snacks, and can even open his own snacks. Really, everything that this new baby can't.
Are there any moms out there that have felt this? The panic to get things done, or that maybe you aren't up for the gigantic task head of them? What do you do? Other than the typical, wait until he gets here, everything will come back. Joe tells me that, but it is hard to believe in the middle of a melt down (not that I would know.)
For all of the moms out there, where were your priorities? When you had this never ending list of things to do, what did you do first, and what would you do different? I need a little help, more mental than physical. What worked for you?
3 comments:
Val don't worry about it!! It really will all come together. I say start first by cleaning the main parts of your house. Organize his dresser. Diapers etc. ASK FOR HELP!!! Jacob will be more help than you will realize. It will all be fine I promise!! Love you and cant wait!!
It's okay Val! I've been there. Heck, I've only got about 6 weeks left and I haven't set up the crib (I have no idea where we're putting it yet, either), only a few days worth of baby girl clothes in newborn and 0-3 months sizes, no diapers, no idea where most of the baby stuff in general is, and a carseat and stroller that are about as filthy as a hog in a mud sty. Our house is completely unorganized and there are a million projects I'd like to finish before she gets here, but there's just no way it's going to happen. I guess we just need to remind ourselves that babies don't know the difference, they just need basics (heck, crib or dresser drawer, would they really care? Not that mine sleep in a drawer, I'm just saying.. haha). You're a great mom! You'll adjust to having two just fine. I think that having one that is able to be much more self-sufficient will make the transition that much easier too! The trick is balancing your time between them. That's just something you have to try and experiment with once you see what their needs will be.
I'm making a few lists of things of projects to finish before the little munchkin gets here: Things I must get done, Things that would be nice but don't absolutely need to happen before hand, and things that can either happen before or after baby arrives. It helps me deal with the stress. Things will come back to you easier than you think, don't worry! Easier said than done! I'm a list person, so anytime I'm feeling overwhelmed I like to write a detailed list of EVERYTHING, tiny or big, that is worrying me or stressing me out. Sometimes making the list and just getting it out there helps, other times I write a separate list next to it of how I can deal with those stressors. (Ie. worried about what to do if baby is colicky, sick, etc : Look up info on methods to ease colic, remedies for babies colds, cpr and emergency info... pin or print for easy access. -or- What if I can't remember how to breastfeed? : Look up tips and hints on breastfeeding from reputable sources, pin or print for easy access).
Anyway, I would just focus on the things that are bothering or worrying you the most, get them out of the way, and remember that you do still have time! :) You'll do great! And CONGRATS!!! (Ps. Sorry for the novel... )
What you're feeling is perfectly normal, but you don't have to worry so much. I remember freaking out specifically that I was going to have a girl, like that I would need to know something different to take care of a new born girl, like how to do her hair. It was silly. You will be amazed how easy taking care of your newborn will be--just like riding a bicycle. I always say I would never ever want to be a first time mom again because it was so hard. Not only will it be easier this time around, you'll be better at it this time because you are more confident.
The most helpful new thing I did when Annie was born was have a great big basket that had everything I needed in it--diapers, wipes, burp rags, clean clothes, extra blankets. This lived right next to my recliner/rocking chair or "command chair" in the living room. It helped so much to not have to run to her bedroom to change her or to get new clothes every few minutes. I could literally do everything while sitting in my chair. Save time and energy.
Other tips: Read Jacob books while you are feeding baby to help him not be so jealous. It's hard to be told "not now, I'm feeding/rocking baby" over and over--you can use the time to give him attention too. Put a fan for white noise (and helps reduce risk of SIDS) in baby's room so you don't have to expect Jacob to be silent when baby is sleeping. It's hard to be told over and over "be quiet, baby is sleeping".
Last tip; buy paper plates and cups, you don't need to do dishes for a few months.
Last, last tip: you'll be awesome and it won't be a 1/10th as bad as you are imagining it.
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